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Funny World War II quotes

Check out these funny World war 2 quotes.

1. General George S. Patton

(addressing to his troops before Operation Overlord(D-Day), June 5, 1944)
“Sure, we want to go home. We want this war over with. The quickest way to get it over with is to go get the ¤¤¤¤¤¤¤s who started it. The quicker they are whipped, the quicker we can go home. The shortest way home is through Berlin and Tokyo. And when we get to Berlin, I am personally going to shoot that paper hanging son-of-a-¤¤¤¤¤ Hitler. Just like I’d shoot a snake!”

(addressing his troops prior to Operation Overlord, June 5, 1944)
“We want to get the hell over there. The quicker we clean up this Goddamned mess, the quicker we can take a little jaunt against the purple pissing Japs and clean out their nest, too. Before the Goddamned Marines get all of the credit.”

(addressing to his troops before Operation Overlord, June 5, 1944)
“There is one great thing that you men will all be able to say after this war is over and you are home once again. You may be thankful that twenty years from now when you are sitting by the fireplace with your grandson on your knee and he asks you what you did in the great World War II, you WON’T have to cough, shift him to the other knee and say, Well, your Granddaddy shoveled ¤¤¤¤ in Louisiana. Dota 2 funniest quotes and sayings No, Sir, you can look him straight in the eye and say, Son, your Granddaddy rode with the Great Third Army and a Son-of-a-Goddamned-¤¤¤¤¤ named Georgie Patton!”

“No ¤¤¤¤¤¤¤ ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb ¤¤¤¤¤¤¤ die for his country.”

2. General Douglas Macarthur, Supreme Allied Commander of South-West Pacific

“Nothing would please me better than if they would give me three months and then attack here.” (speaking of the Philippines, December 5, 1940)

“I shall return.” (speaking about the Philippines, when he was forced to retreat to Austrailia, 1942)

“I have returned.” (at the Philippines, 1944)

3. “Nuts” – General MacAuliffe (when asked to surrender during the Battle of the Bulge, 1944)

4. “All right, they’re on our left, they’re on our right, they’re in front of us, they’re behind us. they can’t get away this time.” – Lieutenant General Lewis B. Chesty Puller (surrounded by 8 enemy divisions)

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Kilroy Was Here!

In 1946 the American Transit Association, through its radio program, “Speak to America,” sponsored a nationwide contest to find the REAL Kilroy, offering a prize of a real trolley car to the person who could prove himself to be the genuine article.

Almost 40 men stepped forward to make that claim, but only James Kilroy from Halifax, Massachusetts had evidence of his identity.

Kilroy was a 46-year old shipyard worker during the war. He worked as a checker at the Fore River Shipyard in Quincy. His job was to go around and check on the number of rivets completed. Riveters were on piecework and got paid by the rivet.

Kilroy would count a block of rivets and put a check mark in semi-waxed lumber chalk, so the rivets wouldn’t be counted twice. When Kilroy went off duty, the riveters would erase the mark.

Later on, an off-shift inspector would come through and count the rivets a second time, resulting in double pay for the riveters.

One day Kilroy’s boss called him into his office. The foreman was upset about all the wages being paid to riveters, and asked him to investigate. It was then that he realized what had been going on.

The tight spaces he had to crawl in to check the rivets didn’t lend themselves to lugging around a paint can and brush, so Kilroy decided to stick with the waxy chalk. He continued to put his checkmark on each job he inspected, but added KILROY WAS HERE in king-sized letters next to the check, and eventually added the sketch of the chap with the long nose peering over the fence and that became part of the Kilroy message. Once he did that, the riveters stopped trying to wipe away his marks.

Ordinarily the rivets and chalk marks would have been covered up with paint. With war on, however, ships were leaving the Quincy Yard so fast that there wasn’t time to paint them.

As a result, Kilroy’s inspection “trademark” was seen by thousands of servicemen who boarded the troopships the yard produced. His message apparently rang a bell with the servicemen, because they picked it up and spread it all over Europe and the South Pacific. Before the war’s end, “Kilroy” had been here, there, and everywhere on the long haul to Berlin and Tokyo.

To the unfortunate troops outbound in those ships, however, he was a complete mystery; all they knew for sure was that some jerk named Kilroy had “been there first.” As a joke, U. S. servicemen began placing the graffiti wherever they landed, claiming it was already there when they arrived.

Kilroy became the U. S. super-GI who had always “already been” wherever GIs went. It became a challenge to place the logo in the most unlikely places imaginable (it is said to be atop Mt. Everest, the Statue of Liberty, the underside of the Arch De Triumphe, and even scrawled in the dust on the moon.)

And as the war went on, the legend grew. Underwater demolition teams routinely sneaked ashore on Japanese-held islands in the Pacific to map the terrain for the coming invasions by U. S. troops (and thus, presumably, were the first GI’s there). On one occasion, however, they reported seeing enemy troops painting over the Kilroy logo!

In 1945, an outhouse was built for the exclusive use of Roosvelt, Stalin, and Churchill at the Potsdam conference.

The first person inside was Stalin, who emerged and asked his aide (in Russian), “Who is Kilroy?” .

To help prove his authenticity in 1946, James Kilroy brought along officials from the shipyard and some of the riveters. He won the trolley car, which he gave to his nine children as a Christmas gift and set it up as a playhouse in the Kilroy front yard in Halifax, Massachusetts.